Persevere

This morning, I went with my friend Janet to a fall market for Aimee Weaver Designs to check out her signs, jewelry and fall decor. While we were there, she had a station set up that you could do your own artwork. Each person could pick out a piece of wood and a word that they wanted to trace and paint. There were words like "grace", "blessed", "brave", "loved" and so on. The word that kept standing out to me was "persevere". I'm not gonna lie, I totally have been spelling this word incorrectly! I always thought it was perservere... I added an extra "r" in there because that is how it sounded to me when you say it. I'm glad she had the words already printed or else my sign would have been a huge fail. Haha oops!

As I thought about the meaning of this word, it seemed to be the perfect description of what we have to do when dealing with any kind of mental health related illness - depression, anxiety, bi-polar disorder, OCD and so-on. When I google "persevere" it gives this as the definition:

To continue in a course of action even in the face of difficulty or with little or no prospect of success.

Some synonyms include endure, persist and press on. My depression may not ever completely go away- it isn't something you can necessarily fix, but it can be managed. Figuring out how to manage it is an ongoing process and understanding that has been a huge part of my healing process. I think where a lot of people struggle is that when something isn't a quick fix, or the first thing they try doesn't work, they often give up. When you're struggling and your brain isn't functioning normally, it can be extremely difficult to find the motivation to continue to work through how you're feeling. Unfortunately, for a lot of people, giving up seems more feasible than trying to figure out how to get better and that is when the thoughts of suicide can start to creep in. Before my suicide attempt, I had myself convinced that this course of action would be easier for everyone - I wouldn't feel this way anymore, and my friends and family wouldn't have to deal with me and my issues.

Another thing I thought of today was what the Bible said about perseverance. In James chapter 1 verse 4, it says "Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Whether you are religious or not, this verse can be an encouragement to anyone. If we persist and press on during the trials in our lives, it develops our character. Persevering is not always easy and it can be a choice that you need to consciously make many times a day. I am still trying to figure out where in my house to put my sign so that it can be a daily reminder to me that even when I'm feeling down, I need to persevere.

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